fight for your life
i listen to music so i don't kill myself
scratch that
i'm listening to music so i don't kill myself
life has been difficult
there's been some big changes
a lot of extra time
a lot of extra space
a lot less space too
somehow
thinking back on the past couple years
my music listening habits slowed down a lot
i used to spend nearly every available moment i could
listening to music
i can think of a few reasons why it slowed down
first is it felt like the music was getting interrupted a lot more
so i wouldn't start it up as often
second is it felt like i wanted to keep myself more available
open to someone that existed in my space
third is i guess i didn't feel like i needed to as much
i think that was at least partly positive
but also partly not
music is reflective
the easiest mirror to listen to
it elicits response
and that response can reveal a lot
tunes to be in tune to
i felt secure enough in order to not need this mirror
at least not in the same way i used to
but in a way
it meant i was ignoring myself
keeping inside what i used to belt out instead
release
amplify
let the beat fuel you
travel from your head
grasp your neck
down the chest
past the abdomen
through the groin
into the legs
round the corner of your knee
as it's picked up
to move your feet
forward
feel the momentum
walk
keep walking
speed it up
run
run
run
run run run
runrunrunrunrunrun
living is an act of violence
against the people that don't want you here
stay alive
it's hard to fuel the will to fight
there may not always be a bite to eat
in the worst moments you might not even have someone next to you
but a tune can be carried no matter the circumstance
everyone needs an anthem
i'm listening to music so i don't kill myself
scratch that
i'm listening to music so i can live